GFA Big Brother!

(Originally posted on the main site from an email by Gaz...)

Channel 4 announces new GFA BIG BROTHER.

The "housemates" must stay in O'Henry's for 10 weeks drinking Carling. They get the opportunity to vote for who they wish to be removed by Ohenries security once per week and must sleep where ever in the bar they can find. Joints are permitted to be rolled only in the cubicles and the big brother pub will be periodically swept by google looking for evidence and paraphernalia, as a twist google will randomly drop blocks of weed for the contestants to find.

In week 7, 3 new contestant will join the game, (leaked sources suggest they will be named tez, nichol and oz). The idea of these new contestants is to throw a spanner in the works and confuse the existing contestants due to the different alcohol levels in the blood – this should result in shaking up the voting process and some interesting situations. Of course the new contestants are also allowed to consume alcohol before entry if they so wish, and no doubt will.

Every friday night big brother opens the GFA club, code named "Fury's" where contestants will be invited to drink for free all night and roll joints on the edge of the dance floor and dance like idiots, again there is the risk of being caught by google in one of his predetermined path sweeps. Big brother also introduced random mid week sessions of vodka at the GFA Solid bar and occasionally opens the big brother secret beer garden.

On the final night of the ten weeks the crew will have been whittled down to only 4, and will be relocated to an unknown flat in Maryhill. Pundits are advising the last four will probably be Gerry, Jen, Gaz, Michael. More specific predictions indicate Michael will leave first, Jen will be removed by google for falling asleep on the job and the remaining two contestants will suffer a severe case of cabin fever and begin destroying computer peripherals.

Who will win GFA Big brother, you choose (who you think will drink themselves into a stupor first)...